Japanese Women Too Desperate for Marriage! Does It Really Have to Be Like This? Or Is It Just a Made Up Fairy Tale?

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Japanese Women Too Desperate for Marriage! Does It Really Have to Be Like This? Or Is It Just a Made Up Fairy Tale?

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Marriage has always been a goal, or maybe a dream for many girls throughout the years. The same also goes for Japanese girls. But in the recent years, the way marriage is portrayed has been changing. There has been a large increase on the age of marriage for both men and women.

These are graphs showing the average age of the first marriage of both men(blue) and women(red). And as you can see the average has been growing year by year for both genders(men:30.9 years old women:29.3 years old in 2013). Both genders have both grown from 6~7 years over the past 60 or so years.



People say this increase has started because of the freedom of love becoming active around the 1980s. Before, Japan usually had patterns in marriage, whether you meet your future husband at your workplace, we call this “Shokuba Renai(Workplace love)”, or you have a “Omiai“, a special meeting of a male and female meant for marriage. “Omiai” is now considered a old fashioned way of getting married since often times, it was said that the parents always chose the partners instead of the actual male and female that were getting married. But at the the same time as falling in love has become more free, the freedom of breaking up anytime, and freedom of when to get married has been earned also. Now is a time they say, “Women, go for hunting, Men, improve yourself.” Women can’t just wait for their prince to arrive, and men can’t just assume that they can get married just because they have a job.

The ideals of a husband and wife has been becoming higher and higher, and many people feel that they don’t have enough opportunities to meet people, and that’s why they can’t get married. Now there are many businesses and services that are specifically marriage related, and there is even a new word called “Konkatsu“, which means activities to actively find marriage. Before we knew it, marriage has become a big lofty dream.

The bridal bible for all women is Zexy. Zexy is a famous magazine that teaches you and gives you all the information you need to know about getting married and having your wedding.

We actually bought this months Zexy! Look how much comes with it, and it’s only 500 yen!


The main book is this thick.(Compared with iPhone 5S)

marriage-zexy-women-10 marriage-zexy-women-07

In every months Zexy, it has a special featured article usually related to tips on having a wedding. It also comes with guides about wedding services, and insurance by the Zexy company. The special part of this magazine is that over half of this thick book is a catalog (it also makes sense why its so thick!). You can find anything in this catalog from wedding rings, invitation companies, bridal services, photo services, chapels, restaurants, just, everything!

We bought the 2015 December vol. 270, and this months Zexy came with these free gifts(“Furoku”).


Most magazines in Japan come with these, but I was surprised with how much Zexy came with this!

These are pot holders for cooking. It has a cute snoopy pattern on it.



This is a Zexy for parents. Inside are many useful tips for parents when their daughter or son is having a wedding and getting married. They are mainly ways for parents to support the preparation of the wedding.



This is a Zexy for the groom. Just like the Zexy for parents, this Zexy has tips and advice on how to support your bride when preparing for your marriage. It also has actual comments from brides on what she liked about what her husband did for her.



Since this month came with a pot holder, it also came with a recipe to make Curry.



This is the household budget and insurance starter book. Since getting married means starting a new life and family, there are many things to get ready. This book helps you sort out what you need  to get ready and do for your new life.



This is a tips sheet for the “Bride Letter”. In many weddings, there is a part where the bride reads a letter saying thank you to her parents and family. Since occasions like these are very rare, many people feel that they don’t want to forget to say anything. This sheet helps you remind you of things to say in your letter.



This is the pink marriage registration sheet. This is one of the major things Zexy made popular. This is the same exact marriage registration sheet you have to turn in to the city hall when getting married. This pink sheet is also valid to turn in and many couples use this since the color pink makes the sheet look even more special.



This is the bridal fair book. Many people go to bridal fairs to create a good image for their own wedding. It gives you the complete guide on the many bridal fairs taking place.



This is Zexy Premier, a special booklet for those who are having a wedding around the ages of 30s~40s. Instead of the usual gorgeous flashy kind of  weddings, this book guides you about the simple, yet fashionable and fun weddings suitable for the target ages.



This a different catalog just for dresses and bridal esthetic treatments. This is very important for the girls. Most people only end up wearing a wedding dress only once in their lifetime. Who doesn’t want to look beautiful in it? It is the usual routine for most women when having a wedding, they go to bridal esthetic treatments from around a year to half a year before their wedding to prepare.



I think this trend in Japan is very interesting. I mean, when did getting married seem difficult first? Since I can’t even imagine getting married yet, this “desperate for marriage” and “marriage is the true happiness for women” popularity and business seems strange. Of course if it comes to having a wedding, a book like Zexy would be perfect since it takes you from the start to end, everything. Maybe just taking advantage over these businesses are the best ways not to get dragged away.

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Uni student. Grew up in Chicago. Always seeking ways to escape to the 2 or 2.5 dimensional world.

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